


fuck im doomed

by jackstanifold



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Clay | Dream & Technoblade Friendship (Video Blogging RPF), Crack Treated Seriously, Cussing, Group chat, Mmmm, Teens being teens, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, all's pretty much normal ig, bad is a war profiteer with a criminal background, connor has no idea what's going on, might add ant and velvet in later, phil is a fucking badass, they're kinda cute together ngl, tommy is a rat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:08:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28401417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jackstanifold/pseuds/jackstanifold
Summary: dream makes a gc for all of his friends. unfortunately, they are all dumb as hell.idk man i just wanted to write smthing funny
Relationships: Antfrost & Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Darryl Noveschosch & Sapnap, Clay | Dream & Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, No Romantic Relationship(s), Zak Ahmed & Darryl Noveschosch
Comments: 25
Kudos: 173





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is entirely self indulgent. 
> 
> give me suggestions on what to add.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> usernames because im dumb as hell and forgot to add them:
> 
> dream- dream  
> sapdaddy- sapnap  
> george- george  
> actual war criminal- bad  
> geppy- skeppy  
> sad boi hours- wilbur  
> god- technoblade  
> dutch- fundy  
> a good person- niki  
> bitch- eret  
> homophobe- schlatt  
> ass- quackity  
> pants- connor  
> hjonk- karl  
> white boy- punz  
> phil watson/ dad- phil  
> massive man- tommy  
> tuddo- tubbo

**< dream has created a new group chat>**

**< dream has named the group chat "fuck im doomed>**

**< dream has added George, sapdaddy and 12 others to the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**dream:** hepl.

 **sapdaddy:** what.

 **dream:** i didn't do my engniks hw

 **geppy:** o shki me neigthd!

 **geppy:** whay wads kit??

 **God:** what the hell are you guys saying.

 **actual war criminal:** Dream and Skeppy didn't do their English homework.

 **dream:** thanks bad.

 **geppy:** thsbk s bafd

 **actual war criminal** : ofc!

 **God** : ok but why are we all in this group chat?

 **dream** : i need help with it, duh.

 **sapdaddy** : lol suffer bitch.

**< sapdaddy has left the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**< dream has added sapdaddy to the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**sapdaddy** : shit.

 **actual war criminal:** Language ರ╭╮ರ

 **George** : wait what's going on?

 **sad boi hours** : dream didn't do his homework and is assuming we know how to read.

 **George:** wilbur, you're a senior in high school, please tell me you know how to read. 

**sad boi hours** : lmfao no

 **DUTCH** : unsurprising.

 **sad boi hours** : stfu. 

**A Good Person** : Oh, Dream, I'll help you, if you want!

 **dream** : niki ily.

 **dream** : actually let me @ the actually nice people.

 **dream** : @BItch @hjonk @actual war criminal @DUTCH 

**dream** : pls help.

 **DUTCH** : why was i included in that???? 

**dream** : because you're smart

 **DUTCH** : oh. 

**DUTCH** : that doesn't mean i'll help you. 

**BItch** : i'll help you ig

 **dream** : ERET ILY.

 **actual war criminal** : what do you need exactly?

 **dream** : a summary of farenheit 420

 **actual war criminal** : that is not the name of the book.

 **dream** : yeah it is.

 **geppy** : yeah it is.

 **sad boi hours** : yeah it is.

 **homophobe** : yeah it is.

 **A Good Person** : Oh.

 **A Good Person** : Hello Schlatt.

 **homophobe** : hey niki.

 **homophobe** : why do you sound like you want to kill me.

 **A Good Person** : Guess :).

 **homophobe** : .

 **homophobe** : fuck.

 **DUTCH** : i feel like i'm missing something here???

 **homophobe** : fundy, whatever she tells you is a lie. i was your friend first.

 **DUTCH** : she's literally my sister. 

**DUTCH** : i've only known you for two months.

 **DUTCH** : we've had like three conversations.

 **pants** : what the fuck?

 **actual war criminal** : Language! ಠ ೧ ಠ

 **pants** : i literally don't know anyone in this chat.

 **dream** : yeah, you do. you know me, schlatt and wilbur.

 **pants** :....

 **pants** : clay? from math class??? how the hell did you get my number???

 **dream** : :)

 **homophobe** : wait whore you?

 **pants** : please tell me you're not schlatt.

 **homophobe** : whore you?!

 **pants** : connor??

 **sad boi hours** : oh hi connor :).

 **pants** : wilbur?????????

 **sad boi hours** : yeah hi.

 **hjonk** : wait why am i here?

 **dream** : karl!!!!

 **sapdaddy** : karl!!!!

 **ass** : karl!!!!

 **hjonk** : dream!!! sapnap!!! q!!! hi guys!!!

 **homophobe** : never change, jacobs.

 **DUTCH** : wait, schitt, we never got an explanation for why niki's mad at you?

 **homophobe** : oh yeah.

 **homophobe** : blew up her cake.

 **BItch** : you.

 **BItch** : you what.

 **homophobe** : yeah.

 **homophobe** : home ec.

 **homophobe** : it was an accident

 **homophobe** : mostly.

 **God:** it was entirely on purpose, wasn't it.

 **homophobe** : ;)

 **A Good Person** : I'm going to strangle you to death with your own shoelaces.

 **homophobe** : oh.

 **ass** : get him, niki.

 **DUTCH** : fuck him up.

 **sad boi hours:** wreck his shit.

 **pants** : why is there someone named God. 

**pants** : who is dutch???

 **dream:** oh yeah. @everyone introduce yourself.

 **God** : technoblade.

 **DUTCH** : i'm fundy. hello.

 **hjonk** : i'm karl!!!! 

**BItch** : my name's eret, hi!

 **ass** : im quackity, i'm the cool 1

 **George** : i'm goerge.

 **sapdaddy:** sapnap.

 **geppy:** is anuone gokng to pojnt out thst gorge mispled his onw name?

 **George:** no.

 **geppy:** ok.

 **actual war criminal** : "Geppy" is Skeppy by the way. 

**actual war criminal:** I'm Bad! It's nice to meet you!

 **A Good Person:** I'm Niki, hi!

 **ass:** wait, while we're all online.

 **ass:** does anyone kno math.

 **ass:** wait.

**< ass has added white boy to the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**white boy:** no.

 **ass:** please.

 **ass:** i beg you.

 **white boy:** quackity, we are not friends. i will not help you with your homework.

 **dream:** who're you?

 **white boy:** punz.

 **sapdaddy:** hey punz

 **white boy:** hhh. sapnap :/.

 **dream:** oh you're the kid i paid 25$ to be my friend in third grade.

 **dream:** wait 

**God:** SCREENSHOTTED.

 **dream:** FUCK

 **dream:** I WAS JOKING

 **white boy:** no. no you weren't.

 **ass:** wait can somebody help me with my homework though?

 **sapdaddy:** no. 

**ass:** fuck :(

 **ass:** wait.

**< ass has added Phil Watson to the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**God:** dad?!!!

 **pants:** what

 **sad boi hours:** wait dad what

 **ass:** hello mr watson

 **Phil Watson:** How did you get my number.

 **ass:** i need help with homework

 **ass:** wait

**< ass changed Phil Watson's name to dad>**

**dad:** What.

 **God:** dad what are you doing here.

 **ass:** ha!

 **dream:** stop adding people.

 **ass:** no.

 **ass:** what're you going to do about it, pissbaby.

 **dream:** >:0

 **actual war criminal:** Languange, oh my goshhh (눈‸눈)

 **homophobe:** wait, can i add someone?

 **dream:** no.

 **homophobe:** cool thanks.

**< homophobe added MASSIVE MAN to the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**MASSIVE MAN:** AAYYYY

 **homophobe:** TOMMYYY

 **MASSIVE MAN:** SCHLATTTTT

 **ass:** TOMMY

 **MASSIVE MAN:** BIG Q

 **dream:** thomathy

 **MASSIVE MAN:** DREAM

 **God:** tom.

 **MASSIVE MAN:** technoblade.

 **MASSIVE MAN:** bitch.

 **dream:** stop adding people, seriously.

 **MASSIVE MAN:** no.

**< MASSIVE MAN has added tuddo to the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**tuddo:** hi?

 **dream:** fuck this

**< dream has left the group chat "fuck im doomed">**

**< dad has added dream to the group chat "fuck im doomed"> **

**dad:** Our hell now. You're merely a guest here.

 **God:** holy shit, dad.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one of the people on my discord server said they'd pay me 25 cents to continue this and add corpse so

**< fuck im doomed>**

**< tuddo has added Ranboo to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**tuddo:** evryone meet ranboo gtg be nice

**Ranboo:** Hello?

**dream:** the newest lost soul wanders in

**Ranboo:** Uh-

**actual war criminal:** DReam you’re scaring him >:(

**dream:** goood

**dream:** he shoudl be scared

**sapdaddy:** dream are you fucking high

**actual war criminal:** LANGUAGE

**dream:** no lul

**A Good Person:** is anyone going to talk to the new kid?

**Ranboo:** Oh, I’m fine, just watching.

**DUTCH:** no ones’ dfine here, it;s hell

**dream:** ^^^

**dream:** but welcome ig

**Ranboo:** Thank you!

**Ranboo:** I don’t think any of you know me, I go to a different school.

**DUTCH:** irrelevant you are here now.

**Catboy UWU:** Oh hi, welcome.

**DUTCH:** NO YOU’RE NEVER ONLINE GO AWAY

**Catboy UWU:** No UwU

**Ranboo:** ???

**Catboy UWU:** The username is only half ironic.

**Catboy UWU:** I wore a catmaid outfit to school.

**Catboy UWU:** I refuse to live it down.

**Ranboo:** That’s horrifying.

**Catboy UWU:** Thank you, I try.

**George:** whatd i miss?

**Catboy UWU:** GEORGE

**George:** hbomb??! you’re actually online?!

**Catboy UWU:** Yes :3

**BItch:** my day be so fine, then boom, hbomb

**Catboy UWU:** Eret I thought we were friends. ;(

**BItch:** sorry, that was mean of me.

**Catboy UWU:** I forgive you :3

**DUTCH:** someone end me

**George:** ok

**MASSIVE MAN:** ok

**homophobe:** ok

**ass:** ok

**sad boi hours:** ok

**dad:** ok

**Ranboo:** Wait, why is there someone named Dad?

**ass:** bcuz he’s old

**dad:** No. 

**dad:** It’s because im a father

**ass:** and old.

**dad:** Motherfucker.

**ass:** :0

**sad boi hours:** get his ass, phil!!!

**MASSIVE MAN:** why do you calle ur own faher by his first name

**dad:** Literally none of you call me Dad.

**Ranboo:** I still don’t know anyone.

**pants:** you get used to it

**Ranboo:** What’s up with these names?

**dream:** your group chat name should sum up your being.

**dream:** who you are as a person

**homophobe:** yeah

**homophobe:** wait

**Ranboo:** uH-

**homophobe:** ok i know how this looks.

**ass:** lakdhhdkjshfjsdhfjhgsdjf;gdjgf

**ass:** jedidiah schlatt homophobe confirmed???????

**MASSIVE MAN:** homophobia id cirnge

**homophobe:** shup up tommy

**homophobe:** im not actually homophobic, i swear

**ass:** he juts hates gay peiple.

**homophobe:** only specific ones

**Ranboo:** Can I ask which ones?

**homophobe:** @sad boi hours

**homophobe:** also quackity

**homophobe:** mostly quackiyt

**ass:** HEART BENE BLROKE SO MANY TIMESD

**BItch:** L

**sapdaddy:** wait what’s a fuck fact about you

**sapdaddy:** *fun

**Ranboo:** Me?

**sapdaddy:** yeah

**Ranboo:** Uhhhhhhhh….

**Ranboo:** I am 6’6”

**MASSIVE MAN:** SAY SIKE RFN

**Ranboo:** It’s true.

**MASSIVE MAN:** HOW OLD RU

**Ranboo:** A minor?

**sapdaddy:** f for tommy

**< sapdaddy has changed ‘Ranboo’s name to ‘slenderman’>**

**slenderman:** ???

**pants:** not the worst one here ngl

**pants:** definitely beats @white boy

**white boy:** Stfu

**slenderman:** Am I allowed to leave?

**George:** no

**sapdaddy:** you are, but you’ll be back.

**hjonk:** WAIT CAN I ADD SOMEONE?!

**sapdaddy:** ofc <3

**dream:** you are NOt in charge here smh

**dream:** but yes karl, you may

**< hjonk has added catboy hooters to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**hjonk:** CORSPE!

**dream:** OH

**dream:** YOU

**catboy hooters:** do i know you?

**dream:** yeah it’s me, dream

**dream:** im on the mchs football team

**catboy hooters:** ohhhh the blond guy

**dream:** i

**dream:** i mean yeah

**< sapdaddy has changed ‘dream’s name to ‘the blond guy’>**

**the blond guy:** fuck

**sapdaddy:** L

**catboy hooters:** oh.

**catboy hooters:** who are you?

**sapdaddy:** i’m kale’s husband, sapnap

**sapdaddy:** *KARL

**sapdaddy:** I MEANT KARL

**hjonk:** D:

**sapdaddy:** I’M SORRY MY LOVE

**sapdaddy:** I’M SO SORRY

**tuddo:** what’d i miss?

**hjonk:** I can’t believe this, Sapnap.

**catboy hooters:** hello tuddo.

**hjonk:** im breaking up with you

**sapdaddy:** NO

**catboy hooters:** you didn’t miss much

**ass:** WAIT KARL IF YOURE SINGLE NOW WITLL YOU MARRY ME???!

**catboy hooters:** we changed dream’s nickname

**homophobe:** wait qualky i thought we were married??

**catboy hooters:** oh yeah, i joined.

**catboy hooters:** not much else.

**ass:** I WANT A DIVORCE JSCHITT

**homophobe:** FLATTY PATTY

**tuddo:** oh, okay!

**ass:** WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME

**tuddo:** welcome to the group chat!

**tuddo:** my name is tubbo :)

**homophobe:** FLATTY PATTY

**sapdaddy:** KARL TAKE ME BACK PLZ

**catboy hooters:** hey, im corpse.

**catboy hooters:** nice to meet you, tubbo.

**hjonk:** NO, YOU CALLED ME KALE

**sapdaddy:** IM SORRY

**tuddo:** nice to meet you too!

**ass:** BITCH MY ASS IS FAT AS HELL AND YOU KNOW IT, YOU FUCKING SEA SLUG OF A MAN.

**Catboy UWU:** Does anyone have the math homework?

**the blond guy:** wait while we’re divorcing

**the blond guy:** @DUTCH i’m breaking up w you

**the blond guy:** my heart belongs to george

**slenderman:** I am having a stroke.

**DUTCH:** WHAT

**tuddo:** L   
**sad boi hours:** guys it’s 4:20

**slenderman:** Nice.

**sapdaddy:** nice

**Catboy UWU:** nice

**homophobe:** nice

**hjonk:** nice

**tuddo:** nice

**DUTCH:** nice.

**geppy:** nice

**BItch:** it is literally 3:18?

**MASSIVE MAN:** nice

**the blond guy:** nice

**George:** shut up eret

**BItch:** ??!

**sapdaddy:** fuck eret all my homies hate eret

**homophobe:** yeah

**God:** Schlatt stop being homophobic

**homophobe:** WHAT

**the blond guy:** HE’S OFFLINE AGAIN AJKDHFAGDFJKSGFJKDSF;JKSDFH

**MASSIVE MAN:** he takes lurking to thke netx lekel

**God:** It’s called skill.

**the blond guy:** WHAT

**the blond guy:** COME BACK

**the blond guy:** PLASE

**the blond guy:** PSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSP

**slenderman:** Don’t psps at him.

**slenderman:** He’s not a cat.

**slenderman:** I think.

**God:** I’m not.

**the blond guy:** TECHNOBLADE!

**slenderman:** Oh, hi!

**God:** Hello, Ranboo.

**the blond guy:** and dream?

**God:** Hello, Ranboo.

**God:** How are you, Ranboo?

**God:** I don’t think we’ve met.

**MASSIVE MAN:** L FOR DREAM LMFAOOOOO

**the blond guy:** :(

**slenderman:** I’m good!

**slenderman:** I don’t think we have, actually.

**God:** Interesting.

**God:** Where are your parents?

**tuddo:** uh oh.

**tuddo:** ranboob don’t answer that.

**God:** Ranboo, where are your parents?

**slenderman:** Uhhhh…

**God:** Ranboo, are you an orphan?

**the blond guy:** rip

**slenderman:** UHHHH…

**God:** Ranboo?

**slenderman:** I am technically not an orphan, because I am in foster care.

**God:** Hmmm.

**God:** I will let you live for now.

**the blond guy:** why do you hate orphans so much

**God:** I have never met an orphan who wasn’t a bitch.

**MASSIVE MAN:** wait

**MASSIVE MAN:** TECHNO

**MASSIVE MAN:** IM AN ORPHAN

**God:** Yes, and?

**MASSIVE MAN:** DAD

**MASSIVE MAN:** @dad @dad @dad @dad @dad @dad @dad @dad 

**dad:** what

**MASSIVE MAN:** techno called me a bitch

**God:** Rat.

**dad:** technically, he called all orphans bitches

**MASSIVE MAN:** im an orphan

**dad:** one: no, because i adopted you

**dad:** two: i haven’t legally adopted him, which means he’s an orphan still.

**God:** Fuck.

**slenderman:** Today keeps getting stranger and stranger.

**MASSIVE MAN:** L


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PEOPLE ON MY DISCORD SERVER THINK I'M FUNNY
> 
> everyone waiting for 'welcome to the server' updates: i'm sorry, i am very easily distracted, the chapter is almost done, i love you

**< fuck im doomed>**

**the blond guy:** guys

**the blond guy:** @everyone

**the blond guy:** who all is married?

**sapdaddy:** me adn karl

**hjonk:** yeah! :D

**homophobe:** quackity and i, i think.

**ass:** L no.

**ass:** i’m leaving you and marrying bad

**actual war criminal:** No, you are not.

**geppy:** no youre noy

**ass:** aw.

**ass:** okay, im marrying technoblade then

**God:** i will end your bloodline

**ass:** … fuck i guess im alone.

**homophobe:** you could come back to me?

**sad boi hours:** no, schlatt and i are now dating.

**homophobe:** oh, ok, neverminf

**hjonk:** alex, you could marry sapnap and me!

**ass:** :0

**ass:** really???

**sapdaddy:** really???!!

**hjonk:** yes :)

**ass:** :]

**the blond guy:** bad and skeppy are married, of course.

**ass:** naturally

**geppy:** ?????

**the blond guy:** @George @George @George

**the blond guy:** marry me?

**George:** no.   
**DUTCH:** oh.

**ass:** holy shit.

**sapdaddy:** collllddd….

**DUTCH:** dream literally just stopped moving.

**DUTCH:** he hasn’t moved.

**< the blond guy has added “Captain Puffy” to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**the blond guy:** mommy

**the blond guy:** he broke up with me :(

**George:** WHAT

**George:** WHY DID YOU ADD HER???!!!

**Captain Puffy:** Wait, why am I here?

**the blond guy:** george broke up with me :(

**George:** WE WERE NEVER DATING??!

**Captain Puffy:** You broke my son's heart??

**ass:** oh shit, this is better than most movies

**George:** i am sorry ma’am

**George:** but your son is a bitch

**actual war criminal:** language

**Captain Puffy:** Understandable, he is my least favorite.

**the blond guy:** YOU LIKE FOOLISH MORE THAN ME???!

**slenderman:** The more I learn, the less I know.

**the blond guy:** puffy’s not my real mom.

**the blond guy:** she just adopted me <3

**Captain Puffy:** I regret it everyday <3

**slenderman:** And you have a “brother” named Foolish?

**the blond guy:** no, i am not realated to foolish, my mother is his father.

**slenderman:** I am so incredibly confused.

**slenderman:** You guys are so weird.

**tuddo:** schlatt is my fakjther

**DUTCH:** wilbut is mine.

**sapdaddy:** bad is mine L

**ass:** george and i are bgrothers

**ass:** our fathler is awesamude

**MASSIVE MAN:** SAM IS ALS O MY FAJTHER.

**slenderman:** What about Phil?

**the blond guy:** hang on

**< the blond guy has added “Sam Nook” to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**< the blond guy has added “stupid <3” to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**< the blond guy has added “B O N K” to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**the blond guy:** i added ponk to ensure sam sticking around.

**Sam Nook:** What?

**MASSIVE MAN:** SAM

**Sam Nook:** TOMMY!!!

**Captain Puffy:** Foolish, my beloved.

**stupid <3: ** hi dad

**dad:** Greetings Samuel.

**Sam Nook:** Hi Phil! :D

**dad:** I heard you are adopting my son, Samuel.

**Sam Nook:** Yes, I am! :)

**MASSIVE MAN:** sam stares philza minecraft himself in the face and does not falter.

**slenderman:** I have no idea what’s going on.

**slenderman:** As per usual.

**Sam Nook:** Hi, I’m Sam! I’m Tommy’s father.

**MASSIVE MAN:** (he plays american football in college.)

**MASSIVE MAN:** (very cool)

**Sam Nook:** Thank you Tommy. ^u^

**B O N K:** whats going on.

**white boy:** EW IS THAT PONK.

**white boy:** GROSS.

**Sam Nook:** Hi Punz!

**white boy:** Sam.

**B O N K:** why gross?

**B O N K:** im a very cool guy, ok?

**B O N K:** you’re just dumb

**George:** no he’s right

**B O N K:** :’(

**Sam Nook:** Ponk, I think you’re wonderful.

**B O N K:** sam i love you.

**stupid <3: ** you mugged me one time.

**B O N K:** oh.

**B O N K:** yeah, i did but it was funny so :/

**stupid <3: ** i

**stupid <3: ** well, i guess you’ve got a point there.

**stupid <3: ** ponk:1, foolish:0

**Captain Puffy:** YOU MUGGED MY SON???

**Captain Puffy:** YOU WILL APAY.

**Captain Puffy:** I WIIIL BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSE

**Captain Puffy:** AGAIN

**B O N K:** nooooo im sorryyyyy….

**stupid <3: ** i forgive you!

**George:** youre too nice fool

**George:** let her kill him.

**George:** please

**George:** i beg you

**George:** foolish

**George:** let him die.

**B O N K:** i don’t feel very appreciated here.

**actual war criminal:** Didn’t you go out of your way to hit Ant with your car?

**actual war criminal:** Twice???

**B O N K:** no.

**< actual war criminal has added “mowotherfuwucker” to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**actual war criminal:** Ant, did Ponk hit you with his car?

**mowotherfuwucker:** lkjasdkjak yeah

**slenderman:** Did he actually???

**mowotherfuwucker:** he doesn’t like me because im gay smh

**B O N K:** no, i don’t like you because you’re a catboy.

**homophobe:** oh shit, homophobia is real???

**God:** Oh boy do i have some bad news for you.

**slenderman:** Hi Technoblade!

**slenderman:** How are you?

**God:** life is an eternal cycle of pain and death, filled with the void of regret, only occasionally broken by a glimpse of sunlight.

**slenderman:** Oh.

**slenderman:** I’m doing pretty good, myself.

**God:** glad to hear it.

**A Good Person:** hi puffy <3

**Captain Puffy:** Hi Nihachu <3

**homophobe:** ew.

**sad boi hours:** stop being homophobic

**< MASSIVE MAN has added “jack” to the group chat “fuck im doomed”>**

**MASSIVE MAN:** HEY JACK MANIFOLD NICE FACE

**MASSIVE MAN:** IT’D BE A SHAME

**MASSIVE MAN:** IF SOMETHING WERE TO HAPPEN TO IT

**MASSIVE MAN:** LIKE FIRE

**MASSIVE MAN:** IM GOING TO SET U ON FIRE JACK MANOFLOD

**MASSIVE MAN:** AGAIN

**Sam Nook:** Jack I’m going to shoot you.    
**DUTCH:** Jack ManifUCK YOU

**white boy:** fuck jack manifold all my homies hate jack manifold

**< B O N K has renamed the groupchat: “jack manifold hate party”>**

**jack:** ia m just

**jack:** sitting here

**the earth itself:** sucks to suck ig

**jack:** ??!!???!?!?!?

**the blond guy:** oh hi callahan!

**sapdaddy:** callahan my beloved.

**Sam Nook:** He’s offline again.

**God:** the only person more unpredictable than me </3

**jack:** L

**God:** I will Kill you again.

**slenderman:** Again???

**Catboy UwU:** DOES ANYONE HAVE MATH HW ANSWERS I BEG OF YOU

**DUTCH:** then beg

**stupid <3: ** yeah i got you

**Catboy UwU:** stupid my beloved.

**stupid <3: ** that’s me :)

**B O N K:** I’m going to Murder YOu and Hide your badoy

**stupid <3: ** oh.

**jack:** badoy lol

**B O N K:** shut up jack manifold.

**MASSIVE MAN:** shut up jack manifold.

**Sam Nook:** shut up jack manifold.

**dad:** shut up jack manifold.

**pants:** shut up jack manifold.

**Catboy UwU:** shut up jack manifold.

**Mowother Fuwucker:** shut up jack manifold.

**geppy:** shut up jack manifold.

**sad boi hours:** shut up jack manifold.

**jack:** wtf

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, i'm tired


End file.
